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Hoshikaze 2250 :: Consulter le sujet - 14 - L'amour du risque
Hoshikaze 2250
http://hoshikaze.net/hk-forum/

14 - L'amour du risque
http://hoshikaze.net/hk-forum/viewtopic.php?f=74&t=650
Page 1 sur 1

Auteur :  selenim [ Lun 20 Sep 2010 18:33 ]
Sujet du message :  14 - L'amour du risque


Auteur :  Cialf [ Lun 20 Sep 2010 20:39 ]
Sujet du message :  Re: 014 - L'amour du risque

Très bon récit, très vif, parfois un peu trop rapide (un chouïa de description des lieux ne ferait pas de mal). Il est tout de même peu probable que la KallenCorp achète un logiciel aussi stratégique à un commerçant complètement inconnu: DD devrait prévoir un subterfuge pour se donner de fausses références.

Auteur :  mutos [ Mar 21 Sep 2010 05:05 ]
Sujet du message :  Re: 014 - L'amour du risque

Bonjour Cialf,


En effet, à retravailler ce point. Je pense que l'on peut partir sur deux pistes : d'une part on est loin des bases principales de la Corpo, et d'autre part, DD pourrait par exemple se forger une identité comme représentant indépendant d'une boîte "classique" de softs. Avec quelques références locales et ce qu'il faut (baratin, pots de vins, etc...) pour endormir la méfiance de la succursale ciblée, la vérification ne remontera pas plus haut et çà passera... Et çà laisse de la place pour développer quelques scènes de négo intéressantes ^-^

Auteur :  jollyroger [ Jeu 23 Sep 2010 09:46 ]
Sujet du message :  Re: 014 - L'amour du risque

Bonjour Mutos,

C'est la femme de Jollyrodgers qui te parle et non lui.
J'ai trouvé le début un peu "longuet" la suite est assez interressante.
QD au logiciel acheté sans verification à un inconnu cela ne me gene pas.

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